Identify your elephants

Identify your elephants

Sheila and Sam have never gotten along well, and when they are assigned to a key project together, neither person is pleased. Minor tensions slowly grow into full-scale battle, and the rest of the team is uncertain about what to do. They encourage Sheila and Sam to...
Listen when you do not want to hear

Listen when you do not want to hear

On a couple of occasions recently, I’ve been challenged to listen to feedback that I did not welcome. In one case, it was a long-term member of an organization in which I hold a volunteer leadership role. This person was upset about a number of issues, and was...
Can you really say no to your boss?

Can you really say no to your boss?

Even when you have a positive relationship, bringing bad news to the boss is something most people would rather avoid. This includes telling the boss, “no,” even when it’s the right thing to do. Sure, the supervisor should welcome honesty and candor...
Swearing: colorful or crude?

Swearing: colorful or crude?

“Life is a four-letter word.” (Lenny Bruce) One of the most influential memories from childhood involves my brother getting his mouth washed out with soap for uttering a swear word. I can’t recall the specific word, but I do remember the gagging,...
Communication courtesies

Communication courtesies

“Really big people are, above everything else, courteous, considerate and generous – not just to some people in some circumstances – but to everyone all the time.” Thomas J. Watson Put another way: “A person who is nice to you but rude to...